My eldest son heard a recording of his voice and thought my phone was broken. “That’s not what my voice sounds like!” he exclaimed, in the exact same tone of voice that had just emanated from the device.
It’s an interesting phenomenon that we don’t hear the sound of our own voices the way that others do. It has to do with how a significant amount of the sound from our voice is conducted directly through our bones to our ears, while others only hear the sound conducted through the air.
Similarly, psychological studies have indicated that people prefer pictures of themselves that are flipped left to right, while their family and friends prefer pictures of them that have not been flipped. Psychologists have suggested that this is because we are used to looking at ourselves in a mirror (which displays a flipped image), while others view us straight on.
The bottom line is that we do not naturally view ourselves as others view us.
This week’s Torah portion, Naso, discusses a Nazirite. Someone who takes voluntary restrictions in order to elevate themselves. At the completion of the period the Nazirite vowed to undertake, the Torah says:
וְזֹ֥את תּוֹרַ֖ת הַנָּזִ֑יר בְּי֗וֹם מְלֹאת֙ יְמֵ֣י נִזְר֔וֹ יָבִ֣יא אֹת֔וֹ אֶל־פֶּ֖תַח אֹ֥הֶל מוֹעֵֽד:
This is the law of the Nazirite: On the day his period of Naziritehood is completed, he must present him at the entrance to the Tent of Meeting.
Bamidbar 6:13
Who is the “him” that the Nazirite is supposed to bring to the Tent of Meeting?
Rashi answers that the “him” is referring to “himself.”
Still, if the Torah wanted to say “himself,” it could have just done so. Why does it say “him” instead?
Rabbi Yaakov Asher Sinclair suggests that, if the Nazarite period is successful, the Nazarite will no longer view himself in the skewed way that his ego used to do. Instead, he will see himself as others perceive him. He will have a more clear objective understanding of who he is as a person. Both his true faults and his true strengths.
May we learn to get out of our own heads and see ourselves as others see us.
Good Shabbos,
Rabbi A and the JET Team
